Things are not great, my friends. In the words of my daughters, "2015 sucks. Like, really- 2015 is the worst year ever."
In April, my youngest brother died unexpectedly. In June, my mother-in-law died suddenly. A couple of weeks ago, I was sitting on the floor of my closet sobbing- like you do sometimes. Sam came in and said, "Oh no. Did another relative die?" It's been a lot for all of us to handle.
And, in an effort to move us closer to family, my husband is job hunting. It's a bit like being kicked in the teeth repeatedly. He'll find a job posting he's more than qualified for. We'll check out the town and the schools and distance to the nearest family member. We'll think that this is definitely somewhere we could live. He'll apply. And then nothing. Not even a call for an interview. Just an email weeks later that they've filled the position. It's so frustrating and disheartening.
And then there are the little things that normally I could handle just fine. Sam had his tonsils out over a week ago. He's to the point now that he's fine most of the day. But, he's still waking up in the middle of the night and the first thing in the morning, sobbing and hysterical because he's in pain. On top of all the grief and frustration, it's so difficult to see my baby in pain.
All of this has left me struggling. I feel like I've lost all sense of safety, my optimism, my joy. It would be so easy to give up. To just stop getting out of bed in the morning.
But, I don't want to do that. I want to find joy in life. I know it's there, even when sucky things just keep happening. So, I'm making a decision to look for the happiness in life. I'm going to do the 100 happy days challenge. Everyday on Instagram, I'll be posting one thing that makes me happy. I'll try and remember to do a weekly list here as well for those who don't Instagram.
So, here goes Day #1-
Ponyopolis. Built this morning by my kids using blocks made for them by my dad. Definitely a reason to be happy. So many good memories here, as well, of the amazing block set he made for us when we were kids. Seriously, best block set ever. We could build all the way to the ceiling with it.